Goldwynisms – The Wisdom of Samuel Goldwyn

The legendary film producer and movie mogul Samuel Goldwyn was known for his hilarious abuses of the English language, take a look at our collection of some of his most famous quotes.

“Our comedies are not to be laughed at”

“Ive been laid up with intentional flu”

“I love the ground I walk on”

“For this part I want a lady, somebody thats couth”

“You need Indians? You can get them right from the reservoir”

“I’ll write you a blanket check”

“I don’t think anybody should write his autobiography until after he’s dead”

“I want to make a picture about the Russian secret police: the GOP”

“I can answer you in two words — im possible”

“I would be sticking my head in a moose.”

“I ran into George Kaufman the other night. He was at my house for dinner.”

“I can’t make it, but I hope you’ll give me a raincoat.” —after being invited to dinner

“A verbal contract isn’t worth the paper it’s written on.”

“That’s the trouble with directors. Always biting the hand that lays the golden egg.”

“Anybody who goes to see a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined.”

“Include me out.”

“I want to go where the hand of man has never set foot.”

“Gentlemen, do not underestimate the danger of the atom bomb. It’s dynamite!”

“Even if they had it in the streets, I wouldn’t go.” —said while explaining why he didn’t want to attend Mardi Gras in New Orleans

“You are partly one hundred percent right.”

“I’m going out for some tea and trumpets.”

“Go ahead, but make copies of them first.” —after a secretary asked him if she could destroy some old files

“It will create an excitement that will sweep the country like wildflowers.”

“Go ahead, make a bust of them.” —after a sculptor commented on the beauty of Mrs. Goldwyn’s hands

“I don’t care if it don’t make a nickel, so long as everyone in the United States sees it.” —after The Best Years of Our Lives (1946) took the Oscar for best film

“He’s living beyond his means, but he can afford it.”

“I would rather deal with a smart idiot than with a stupid genius.” — turning down a director known for his huge artistic ego

“A wide screen just makes a bad film twice as bad.”

“Why only twelve? Go out and get thousands!” —on re-staging the Last Supper

“I read part of it all the way through.”

“It always makes me very unhappy to say good-bye to a clog in my machine.” — to an employee who was leaving the studio